I CAN'T be 100 per-cent certain of all the lyrics, but I'm pretty sure the song goes something like, "Jingle bells, blah-blah bells, blah-blah all the way. Oh what fun, it is to sing, when Watford win away."

Well never has a football chant rung so true, as that rarely bellowed festive beauty. Watching Watford away this Christmas, and all season Leicester aside (oh God, remember that hell?), has been a sheer delight. If only the same could be said for the Horns at home.

This year's Christmas period began with a festive trip up to icy Yorkshire in temperatures so cold, most of the Sheffield Wednesday fans had big blue faces to match the scores of empty blue Hillsborough seats.

However an away win after a nightmare journey was the best present Santa could have given me since the replica A-team van he plopped down my chimney in 1985 (though technically it was a man in red called Jobi McAnuff who delivered the goods this time).

It was enough to blast out the memories of the Plymouth defeat, and an antidote to my last wintry trip to Hillsborough, when Ray Lewington's 'Orns had been 3-0 down within about 30 seconds of a snow blizzard.

Then. Came. Boxing. Day. Ughghghh. Feeling too fat to even plonk my chubby bones on my Rookery seat, I stood as much as I could during the Cardiff game.

Hence it was probably technically my own fault that I fell a row down the Rookery stand when St Jobi (Jobi Claus? Father McChrisanuff? No… sorry) delivered another belated gift.

As his equaliser roared in, I went bum over tit with excitement, like some kind of drunk elf. As I flapped around trying to regain my balance, presumably resembling a beached whale in a replica IVECO Hornets shirt, I somehow smashed my shin open and bled all over my nice new Xmas trousers. What an idiot.

That festive pain, should really have been a signal to stay away from the Holy Mecca of Vicarage Road and spend Saturday battling rampant women for 8p sale bargains in Primark instead.

Cue the most bizarre game in recent memory. Did Rangers even have the ball on more than four occasions? Hence, bah humbug etc, I've decided to hate Christmas from now on (unless Watford are travelling away for every festive fixture next year). I'm like the Grinch, Scrooge and Jack Dee rolled into one - thank God 2008 starts with an away trip!