ANYONE who drives to Vicarage Road will have felt the agony of car imprisonment on Saturday…The traffic was a nightmare of biblical proportions. As I began merrily motoring from my Hertfordshire home, it seems every non-football supporting human in the region was also scooting towards Watford. Presumably they were heading to The Harlequin, so they could hunt down a 50p boob tube in Primark or a gravy boat from John Lewis or something. By the time all eight billion of us poured off the M1, there seemed to be more cars in Watford than there was road to put them on.

Slowly motoring along Watford's silly ol' ring road at 0.000000000001mph is never the most exciting adventure… Ocean Drive or Sunset Boulevard it ain't. But on Saturday you could almost feel it creaking with agony. Nothing was moving. As I sat there, from about 1:30 onwards, streams of yellow men, women and children started merrily trotting past my traffic jam on foot. They couldn't have looked happier as they positively skipped towards The Vic knowing they were smart enough not to drive, or to dive into a car park before they reached the ring road. A six year old kid in a red away kit roared past me on rollerskates, Watford scarf flapping in the wind as he reached electric speeds. The swine!

Only TalkSport on my car stereo could save my agony. Alan Brazil, the pundit with a pickled onion for a head, and a thirst that could dry the Guinness brewery in an hour, couldn't have gushed more about the start the Horns have had to the season. And though he may possibly have had one too many, Brazil was right, the Horns are top of the league and though there's been a mini wobble, the points are still flowing in nicely. If only we could relocate The Harlequin to Stoke or somewhere far, far away, life would be complete. Or maybe we could fill every shop with David Pleat / Luton memorabilia so nobody would ever want to go there on a Saturday afternoon. We'd be heading towards the Premiership traffic free! Having said that, where the hell would I buy my gravy boats, or 50p Primark boob tubes? I'll have to dust off my bike in time for Hull City…

Season Ticket holder Lee Coan will be bringing you regular updates on life as a Hornet and following the team on the road throughout the season. To see past articles click here.

The views in this blog are not necessarily the views of Watford Football Club.

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